In the wee hours of the night, I caught myself playing games. Relationship games. It takes a lot for a girl to admit she does these things because girls always deny it. Mind you, it's about that time of the month.
My boyfriend has proven to me how much of an over-achiever he is during these past few months in nursing school. He has a study group session several times a week at the college library or his house where they study until 3, 4, or even 5am. I usually talk to him on the phone until we fall asleep, so I saw it as our everyday "alone" time being taken away from me. We already made it clear in the beginning of our relationship that our education would come first, and I knew that, but I was being selfish. Last night his group was up extremely late again because they had a test today, so I waited up for him to finish so I could talk to him. At 3:30am, I called and asked how much longer, and he said maybe 2 more hours. I got mad, hung up, and turned off my phone. That, friends, is the catcher. I knew what I was doing when I did that. I meant to make him feel guilty or angry. For what? Temporarily putting our relationship second so he could focus on his schoolwork?? Something we agreed upon in the beginning???
At first, I didn't care. I wanted it to simmer, I wanted to make him feel how I felt. "That's what you get." Pure emotion, no rationale. After a few minutes, I realized that I had nothing to back up my reason for doing that. I could've pulled something out of nowhere to make him feel worse like, "You stay up way too late studying and you know that this is the only time I get to really talk to you when we don't see each other. Who studies that late? In groups? At least study when normal people study so it doesn't take away from our alone time." But quite frankly, all of that would be bullsh*t. Plenty of people study at odd hours-- I should know. I've done it, my classmates do it. All I would be trying to accomplish is justification for my selfishness, so I knew better than to say something like that.
That's when I caught myself.
I turned my phone back on and texted him an apology. I told him that I couldn't deal with not having the usual contact everyday. I just missed him. This is when it helps to have an understanding boyfriend: he comforted me and told me that it's good to know that I feel the same way he felt when I was in school and he wasn't. It shows him how much I care about him.
If a guy can deal with a girl's PMS, you two were probably meant to be together.
Another thing I learned today: you can buy $5 bootleg DVDs from a dollar store off of Mayport Road that's located in the same plaza as Grand Buffet. JP bought Fool's Gold. The quality is pretty good considering it was just someone who brought a video camera with a tripod into the theater itself, but I think you could've probably downloaded the DVD-quality movie for free somewhere.
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